9/3/23 - posted summer 2023 wrap-up to prove i'm not dead.

5/17/22 - added some links to links page, and finally added the playlists page!

5/8/22 - updated stamps on home and about pages.

5/7/22 - posted april wrap-up , updated about page.

4/10/22 - posted march wrap-up :)

4/2/22 - added stamps to home and about pages, fixed some weird coding.

4/1/22 - replaced sidebar images to be unique to each page. added dummy pages for most links.

3/31/22 - switched to new layout from seraphsanctum, created and linked guest book, updated not found landing.

3/29/22 - website founded!

behold! the horrors of whimsyland

march 31 2022 - hi! i'm mothman, and welcome to my page! i had never touched html/css outside of minor edits to tumblr themes before three days ago, so this could be interesting.

summer 2023 wrap-up

surprise bitch, bet you thought you'd seen the last of me.

no but fr, i DID NOT forget about this site, contrary to popular belief. i was just too lazy to update it lol. i've been super busy this past year. i'm back in school (hopefully actually finishing this time), getting over a semi-relationship that wrecked me emotionally, moving to a new city, and playing way too much baldur's gate 3 (i am not immune to hot vampire).

with that out of the way, let's get to it.

lived

as previously mentioned, i was in what i had assumed was the beginning of a relationship. i assumed wrong (i think. i'm honestly still not quite sure.). moral of the story: don't date line cooks, no matter how appealing carmy from the bear seems. don't fall for their greasy, malort-filled charm.

i've played a whole dnd campaign since my last update. we did curse of strahd, and i played a character who started out as an 18 year old human girl. throughout the course of the campaign, she 1) was aged 10 years by a hag in the first session 2) died 3) was revivified 4) turned into a werewolf 5) died again 6) reincarnated into a hag 7) died again 8) reincarnated as a gith. she started neutral good and ended up chaotic evil. we just started our newest campaign (tomb of annihilation), and the tiefling twink bard i made died two sessions in, so now i'm playing literal actual ash from the evil dead. that's just how it goes i guess.

i went to an anime convention in july, and i dressed as fig from fantasy high (and aurora from sleeping beauty) (my friends went as gilear, fabian, and riz). i shot my shot with a hot and sexy burlesque performer (who had a split tongue and surgically pointed ears) by passing in my phone number as a tip and we ACTUALLY texted for a while (my rizz is legendary, i don't even need to be seen). sadly, i got a cold and had to leave before the last day. it didn't help that the night before i did acid at the convention center rave and almost choked to death on mini m&m's in our hotel room. i had to take a nap in the parking lot of some random bumfuck supermarket halfway home.

lastly, i moved out of chicago. i'm going back in a year, don't worry, but right now i am going to a community college in my home state (in-state tuition woot woot) to hopefully finally finish school. i've dropped out of college 3 times already (and maybe i'll write about it some day on this page), but i took some time off and i'm ready to dive back in. i just started classes a couple weeks ago, and i'm really enjoying it so far. i'm living on my own for the first time, and my apartment is still a mess that has way too many centipedes, and i'm still sleeping on an air mattress like i'm a post on r/malelivingspace, but it's nice to have space to myself.

watched

DIMENSION 20: FANTASY HIGH SOPHOMORE YEAR

finally got around to watching season 2 (after having rewatched season 1 like…too many times for how many UNWATCHED seasons of this show i have), and WOW do i wish i had done it earlier. i love season 1 so much that i was scared season 2 wouldn’t be as good, but honestly it might be BETTER than season 1. the stakes were perfectly raised and the character arcs are just…*chef’s kiss*

DIMENSION 20: ESCAPE FROM THE BLOODKEEP

i really got the most out of my dropout subscription this summer. this was a fun little sidequest, and it was really fun to see a different cast from usual (especially matthew mercer as a gay ringwraith).

SLC PUNK (1998)

i had never seen this before for some reason, and i LOVED it. i don’t know how actually accurate it is, but i think that even if it’s not accurate, it has truth in the philosophy (namely, harmful youthful experimentations can shape you in positive ways, and don’t gatekeep subcultures you sacks of shit). also, points for blue hair.

SPIDER-MAN: ACROSS THE SPIDER-VERSE (2023)

yes i did see this twice, yes i do want miguel o’hara to rail me into next week, no further comments.

ASTEROID CITY (2023)

probably my favorite wes anderson movie after grand budapest, although i still don’t really get it. i will definitely be rewatching it once it’s streaming on something i have. it’s maybe his most…vague(?) movie, and if you don’t like wes anderson you probably won’t like it, but personally i really vibed with it. also it has one of the best ever jeff goldblum cameos.

HAUNTED MANSION (2023)

they made this for the girls and the gays. as a dedicated fan of both the ride and the 2003 movie that everyone else hates, i was really happy with this!! i think the vast majority of people will think it’s stupid, but it delivered everything i wanted. it’s probably an objectively better movie than the 2003 one, but i personally think the 2003 one is better just for the sheer camp value. but that’s a me thing.

BARBENHEIMER (2023)

i didn’t do barbenheimer for a LONG time and didn’t think i was going to, but i went to go see barbie at like 2 in the afternoon one day, and it put me in such a weird headspace that i knew if i went home i’d just sit and stare at the wall all night, so i went to oppenheimer instead (because then i would have an actual excuse to stare at the wall all night). both movies were fantastic. i have some nit-picks about barbie, but oppenheimer was a perfect film. i have a love-hate relationship with christopher nolan, and i’m very happy that oppenheimer fell into the “love” camp. also, i got carded while buying tickets for oppenheimer?? do i somehow look younger than 17??

listened (podcasts)

YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT

this was my summer of podcasts i guess. i’ve been making my way through the backlog of this show, and i’ve learned so much!! especially from the political episodes. there’s been a couple episodes (esp like…the “multiple personality disorder” episode, oh god) that i didn’t really love how they handle the topic, but overall it’s really good.

THE COMMENT SECTION

i don’t watch drew afualo’s other content (tbh, idk what platform she’s even known from. tiktok? youtube? no idea.), but i LOVE this podcast. she’s so funny and smart, and gets great stories and discussions from her guests. so far i’ve only listened to the episodes where i already know who the guests are (just because a lot of the content focuses on the guests themselves/their area of expertise), but i might go back and listen to the other ones because drew is just such a great host.

WHY WON'T YOU DATE ME?

i just discovered this one because i was reminded how much i love nicole byer, and i didn’t know she had a podcast! i’m once again only listening to the episodes where i know the guests, but most of her guests i actually DO know, so i have plenty of content to c o n s u m e.

BROADWAY BREAKDOWN

my bestie got me into this podcast, and i’m shocked it’s not more well-known! this show benefits a lot from actually knowing what they’re talking about, so i only listen to ones where i know the show. but i know a LOT of shows (ex-theater kid), so that’s fine. i feel like i could be besties with matt koplik. he isn’t afraid to have controversial and unapologetic opinions, while still being open to hearing different viewpoints. also, he has good takes about phantom of the opera.

MUSICALSPLAINING

i binged this while packing/moving, so it’s definitely associated with that time period for me. i definitely prefer angelina as a host to lindsay, although i also love lindsay so don’t come for me. i don’t always agree with their opinions, but that’s not surprising because i tend to have very strong and unpopular opinions on media.

listened (music)

UNREAL UNEARTH - HOZIER

ok this is cheating a little because it JUST came out, but…hozier just never misses. it’s basically like his first two albums had a baby. i was really worried i wouldn’t like this album very much, and i don’t think i like it as much as his previous two, but it IS really good. i particularly like “i, carrion” & “de selby part 1” & “butcher’s tongue”.

PLANET OF THE BASS - DJ CRAZY TIMES FT. MS BILJANA ELECTRONICA

my bestie and i are going as dj crazy times and ms biljana electronica for halloween, so if you’re around nyc then, watch out.

I'M JUST KEN - RYAN GOSLING

i can’t get “my name’s ken (and so am i)” out of my head.

MARY ON A CROSS - GHOST

idk what ghost put in this song but it’s like crack to me.

LARA - THE ARCADIAN WILD

this song reminds me of a dear friend of mine. it's so motivating and sweet. i love this band and they can do no wrong imo.

THE BALLAD OF JANE DOE

i still don’t know what ride the cyclone is.

ICKY - KARD

kard finally released a good song lmao. nickelodeon slime-core. love it. also, the fact that kard released one of the ONLY good kpop songs of the summer...what alternate universe are we in?

MASTERPIECE - MISAMO (TWICE SUB-UNIT)

i was worried about this ep because twice’s music has been really lackluster lately, but since this is targeted towards a japanese audience it actually turned out good. It’s very jazzy and retro and i super dig it. “bouquet” is boring, and i wish songs besides “marshmallow” (my second least favorite song) utilized momo’s low voice, but overall i’m very happy. plus, the music video for “do not touch” is SO GOOD. my favorite song on the ep is definitely “behind the curtain”.

april wrap-up

ok, WOW did this month pass quickly!! i hope none of you were as busy as i was, unless you like being busy, idk your life story.

lived

in comparison to the full and complete death of my social calendar last month due to COVID, this month was incredibly busy. a close friend of mine moved to chicago which has caused me to actually get out of the house a little more (even though i keep breaking or losing things when i go in public for some reason). i also have had a LOT of brunch. to top it off, my dnd character died (totally my fault, we were pulling cards from the deck of many things like idiots), so now i’m playing her sister.

watched

OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH (2022)

everybody and their mother is obsessed with this show right now, and for good reason. everything about it is spectacular. it appeals to such a broad spectrum of people too. you like taika waititi? watch this show. you like pirates? watch this show. you like gay people/are a gay people? watch this show. then do me a favor and watch it again.

SIX

full disclosure, i used to be a pretty hardcore hater of this show. i’m not usually a fan of shows done in revue style (although bloody bloody andrew jackson is a strong exception), and the cringiness of the script and the historical revisionism really rubbed me the wrong way. however, after seeing it live, my mind has changed just a bit. i wouldn’t call myself a “fan” necessarily, but i am less of a hater. yay!!

i really preferred this cast to the original cast, and it’s definitely a show that benefits from being seen live with the energy of a crowd. i also am a BIG fan of tight 90-minute shows with no intermission. if u can score tickets for cheap i definitely recommend (but not if they’re expensive)

FAST TIMES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH (1982)

watched this for 4/20 with my roommate because we had never seen it before. it was kinda different from what i expected, but i liked it more than i thought i would too. apparently there is an alternate tv version that has scenes that aren’t in this one, and i definitely plan on checking it out.

THOR (2011)

the worst thor movie, yes i said it, i will take my love of dark world to the grave with me (unless i rewatch it and realize that it actually is bad and my high school self was just a crazy person for liking it so much). pacing and editing are messy and all over the place, anthony hopkins’ lines are almost incomprehensible, but at least it’s under two hours i guess? my bisexual ass was really having a field day with this one, every character is one of my types (except frigga. sorry babe i’m just not into milfs. you can adopt me though.), but especially my homegirls darcy and loki. this movie is also one of the more bright and colorful movies in the MCU, which has always been something that stuck out to me and it one of the main redeeming factors. still better than iron man 1.

listened

LOVE DIVE - IVE

man oh man, does IVE keep delivering. i firmly believe the best kpop songs are ones that i hate the first time i listen to them (which is why i can’t evaluate one until it’s been out for several weeks). that’s the case with this one, but now i’m obsessed. i made a super stoned trip to walgreens last week to buy some toilet paper, got derailed for 30 minutes, and listened to this song on repeat for the whole errand. it has big throwback vibes, but very ambiguous and i can’t really describe it. definitely different to most kpop being released right now. the styling is also *chef’s kiss*.

BRONCO - ORVILLE PECK

i teased this last month, but i wanted to wait until the full album came out to pass my final judgments. verdict: i wouldn’t be surprised if orville peck ended up as the top artist on my spotify wrapped this year. i have such a love-hate relationship with country music, and my coworkers are very skeptical when i recommend this album bc it seems pretty hard country on the surface, but it’s really nuanced and plays with the genre in creative ways. i prefer this one to his debut album.

i almost can’t even say my favorite tracks because it’s like…the whole album. if you held a gun to my head, i’d probably say “kalahari down.” or “daytona sand.” or “hexie mountains.” or “any turn.” or “let me drown.” or maybe even “city of gold.” or maybe….urghhhh see what i mean? just listen to the whole album.

MAISON - DREAMCATCHER

remember what i said about the best kpop dogs being ones i hate at first? true for this one as well, although i should’ve called it - dreamcatcher has been one of my ult groups since i got into kpop and they literally don’t have a single bad song. they finally got their first ever music show win (a crime that they haven’t won sooner) which is a BIG deal to me on a personal level. the chorus is SO catchy and gets me way too hyped. i’m not super knowledgeable about music and how it’s made (despite literally being a musician), but the production on this album is insanely good.

other highlights of the album include "starlight"(an 80s inspired track), "NO DOT" (su a’s badass solo. 100% would commit murder and/or grind on someone to this.), and "BEAUTY FULL" (dami’s solo track that is basically a mid-2000s avril lavigne song. *heart eyes*)

CRY FOR ME - TWICE

this track came out in 2020, but every couple months it plays on my shuffle and i add it to my currently listening playlist again. the best twice song? a strong perhaps (but it has stiff competition). it will make you fall in love with every member of twice over and over again.

CHANGE YOUR HEART OR DIE - THE MIDNIGHT

UGH ok i always lose my shit every time the midnight releases a new song. their whole shtick is that they do 80s inspired music, which can be overdone, but they’ve been doing that and only that for YEARS and there’s a reason for it. in particular, this track is very billy idol, which…be still my beating heart. it’s particularly good and i hope it means we’re getting a new album soon. hopefully. please god.

MORRISSEY

fuck u morrisey, every bar i’ve gone to for the last month has played a smiths song. leave me alone.

march wrap-up

hello all and welcome to my first monthly wrap up. my brain is one long tangled spaghetti noodle, but writing these every month will hopefully help to unspool it.

lived

first of all, i caught COVID at the glass animals concert, which is basically why i finally caved and tried to figure out how to Make a Website. mostly i’ve just been playing a lot of sims 2 and watching supernatural, effectively transporting myself back to 2007.

watched

FRESH (2022)

i really recommend going into this movie knowing as little as possible, so i’d avoid reading this if you haven’t seen it. that being said, if you watch one movie released so far in 2022, let it be this one.

cannibalism is one of my less favorite horror tropes; i don’t ever find it that scary/shocking, yet i simultaneously think it’s extremely horrific and off putting. despite this, i still really enjoyed this movie. the point isn’t really the cannibalism, but it isn’t used for cheap scares either. the marketing didn’t know how to sell this movie, and i totally get why - it defies plot summary. fantastic performances all around, especially from sebastian stan and a criminally underutilized charlotte le bon. seriously, i have a mighty need for stan’s scenes in this to be set to “thankless job” from repo! the genetic opera.

MARRY ME (2022)

i don’t know whose idea it was to pair up jlo and owen wilson, but they deserve several promotions. wilson is already a pretty appealing guy, but lopez’s star power and charisma really make him an even better everyman-type in comparison. he’s a math teacher! he’s a good dad! his best friend is a lesbian! what more could you want in a man?

rom-coms aren’t really my jam, but this one was really refreshing. it’s not particularly clever or well-made, but it makes up for that with overwhelming ushy-gushiness and genuinely likable characters.

THE TALENTED MR RIPLEY (1999)

so, sue me, i’d never seen this before. i’m always a fan of anything in the “ambiguously homosexual jude law” cinematic universe (and, in fact, i intend to revisit gattaca - a personal favorite of mine - next month, if my roommate will succumb to my bullying), and this was just as good as everyone has been telling me it is. i just wish they’d actually let men kiss on screen! WHY didn’t matt damon and jack davenport get to make out in this? totally unfair. speaking of which, i wasn’t expecting davenport or cate blanchett (!!) to appear on screen, so that was a pleasant surprise.

DEEP WATER (2022)

okay i didn’t watch this one and i don’t plan on it, but i just wanted to touch on how no one talks about the fact that mr. euphoria jacob elordi is in this? and makes out with ana de armas? hello? did i really have to find out that information by being jumpscared by him in a twitter ad?

THE PRINCESS BRIDE (1987)

my mother has always said that there’s only two types of people in the world: people who love the princess bride, and people who haven’t seen it. as usual, my mother is correct.

this is the eternal sick-at-home movie for me, it’s just so comfy and entertaining. not quite a parody but not quite playing it straight either, TPB is perhaps the best fantasy movie of all time (please LOTR fans don’t come for me). if not fantasy, at least fairytale. also, if you’re a parent, i guarantee your kids will love you if you show them this, it’s the perfect family movie.

HEATHERS (1989)

THE dark comedy of all time, as well as one of my favorite movies period. i love showing it to other people for the first time. they’re never expecting it to be as ballsy as it is. i end up watching their reactions more than the movie itself (which is fine because i basically have this thing memorized). veronica shooting off JD’s middle finger is a highlight, as well as the running mineral water bit. seriously, when i saw this for the first time in high school it re-wired my brain.

MOONSHOT (2022)

mediocre romcom starring lana condor and cole sprouse. the plot is badly thought out but the production design and leads are cute. i almost recommend you watch it just to see the absolute insanity that is zach braff as space elon musk/jeff bezos. it comes out of NOWHERE in act 3 and is about the only thing that makes the movie actually worth watching.

listened

i’ve been listening to soooo much orville peck, but i’ll resist talking about him since the full album doesn’t come out until april 8, and i know i’ll listen to almost exclusively that for the entire month.

LAUREL HELL - MITSKI

i’ve had this album on repeat since it dropped in february, and still can’t get enough. i’m a sucker for 80s influence* and this fully delivers “should’ve been me” fully could’ve been a hall & oates song). my fave songs are probably "stay soft", "heat lightning", and "love me more". i DO think mitski should go onstage, throw rocks at her fans, then leave.

TOMBOY - G-IDLE

this song isn’t even that good and rap rap verse is truly atrocious (and camp) BUT i do respect the girls for accidentally releasing a non-binary anthem (“neither man nor woman” in the outro sure is…a lyrical Choice). also, some of the stage outfits this era have been REAL good. minnie and yuqi are thriving. i miss soojin though :( she would’ve bodied this.

FEEL MY RHYTHM - RED VELVET

FINALLY a good red velvet comeback. i didn’t dig "queendom" too much (even tho the b-side “pose” is a banger and a half), but FMR is solid as hell all around. the styling is awesome and the music video is appropriately creepy, so it delivers on all the things i expect from RV. the b-sides could be better, but i’m extremely picky and none of them are bad. excited that they seem to be releasing music consistently again, i definitely thought SME was going to shove them in the dungeon along with f(x).

YOUNG LUV - STAYC

this song is a b-side but i can’t get enough of it. it’ll probably be ported to my listening playlist for next month. i don’t even have words for it. the title track and b-sides are awesome as well. STAYC is always giving y2k bops and i wouldn’t have it any other way.

GingaMingaYo - Billlie

best comeback of the year…? the music is SO good, and the choreography and styling are even BETTER. it’s a serious earworm. billlie is quickly becoming one of my favorite groups, i can’t wait to see what they release next. btw, check out this fancam of tsuki (who is possibly my bias). she’s on STAGE, girl is a seriously impressive performer.

*one of the spotify playlists i’m most proud of is “alternate universe 80s”, which is entirely songs that sound like they could’ve been made in the 80s but weren’t.

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